Enough already dag-nab-it, I am a pretty easygoing sorta fella. Most things, I let roll off my back. Shucks, I’ve enjoyed my convalescence. What’s not to like with a new bed by the wood stove? A dog could become used to this, but DOG GONE IT – enough is enough!
Since I’m a considerate sort, I don’t ask to go out unless I need to actually GO. And at night, only in an emergency, and then I don’t bark. I politely stand at the steps and squeak a little. I’d say I have been an exemplary patient. Like those big words? I do. They make me sound smarter than the average canine. But I digress and besides, complaining is just wasted time.
Being forced to walk on a lead hasn’t been so bad. I took it in stride. That is until Mary got the notion into her head to walk that grassy circle thing she calls “the yard” (I’ve seen her mow it too) with me.
A walk out in the warm breezes, I like as much as anybody. Sophie and I get a chuckle out of watching ‘Miss Southern Fried Fiction’ walking around in circles as we lie on the sidelines. When you take me out to stroll around in a circle is when I draw the line. I like long walks through the woods. Walking leisurely in a practical and nearly STRAIGHT line. Not in circles like a merry-go-round. I don’t mind watching Mary-go-round, but not me. Not Hagar.
Who can call “walking a labyrinth”(that’s what she calls the blasted thing) a walk? It’s more like spinning on a top. I bet my doctor would take a dim view of that as a therapeutic walk. Two steps forward one pivot around and then a decent amount of forwarding movement before another pivot, enough to make this dog dizzy.
But the worst is Sophie lying in the sun watching. I can hear her chuckling. It kills me. That’s all I gotta say about that.